Adressing ANGER

The following is an excerpt taken from a pamphlet created by SYFC (Singapore Youth For Christ) in a series called 'Age of Opportunity'. As it is addressed to parents, I've edited it a little so that it addresses us youths.

The reasons we teens give for our anger or angry expressions are to some degree valid (except the last one listed below)
1. Unreasonable authorities
2. No freedom to make decisions for themselves
3. Inconsistency of adults
4. Parents showing preferential treatment or double standards
5. Having too much to handle, unable to cope
6. AFter a bad day and yet those around are not sensitive
7. People trying to help when they don't know the problem or that they've not heard the whole story or give simplistic solutions
8. Having to clean up the mess that others made
9. When people are rude and inconsiderate
10. God made them with an angsty nature

The problem arises when anger leads to sin. When we are angry, we are in danger and highly vulnerable to do wrong - which is why Ephesians warns us not to "give the devil an opportunity"...

Despite the danger, Paul says it is possible to choose not to sin. Even if one has done wrong, he must change and do good - sharing what he has with others, and edifying those to whom he speaks.

A second danger is holding on to the anger. Paul says "do not let the sun go down on your anger". While we disapprove of Jonah's petty anger, so often, when we ourselves are angry, similar words like "I'm so angry I could die" creep in. THey may not be said aloud but they are repeated in our minds...Anger unchecked can eat away at the heart, affecting the wellbeing of a person as bitterness, wrath and rage develop. We want to "seek justice". The malice of seeing harm come to others surfaces. THese Paul says the believers must work to rid themselves of.

To let go of the anger, Paul turns us to the gospel of forgiveness. The next time the phrase "I'm so angry I could die" comes up, learn to let go of the anger by realizing the Christ has already died ( we don't have to die anymore) so that God's anger against sin is turned away. Since God has forgiven us in CHrist, we can also forgive the hurts we receive, and not fall into sin, from which Christ has redeemed us.

This is all well and good theologically but how do we practically work it out?

Here are some tips...
. Recognize and admit when we are angry.
. Practice restraint...don't react immediately...Replace angry words with gentle words - "A gentle answer quiets anger, but a harshw ord stirs up anger" Proverbs 15:1
. Look at how we are coping with our anger - whether we are repressing (which hurts ourselves) or expressing (wrongfully hurting others). There are people who suggest that the anger be directed to punching pillows or shouting it out, but these methods do not resolve the problem. Work towards resolving the root of the anger...
. Pray...ask God to help us determine whether our anger is righteous or unrighteous. Is our anger motivated by righteous anger or unrighteous, selfish anger? When our anger springs from selfish desires, we use anger as a weapon to manipulate, to get what we want. Throwing tantrums or flying into a rage can be very effective in getting others to bend to what we want, but it is absolutely wrong.
. ...tell God how we honestly feel and ask for His help.
. Work out practically how to use our anger to solve the problem quickly and in a godly and loving way.